Kaiserschmarrn - the fucked up Austrian pancake

Kaiserschmarrn - the fucked up Austrian pancake

Kaiserschmarrn is a classic Austrian dessert that's basically a fancy, shredded pancake, named after Emperor Franz Joseph I. The story goes that his cook was making him a pancake, but accidentally fucked it up. So he fried the pieces and told the emperor "So… This is a special pancake, it's supposed to be served like this." The emperor was all "Dude! This is amazing, all fluffy and has a soft brown crust all around the pieces. You're a food genious!". And it's been a favorite since the 19th century, its name litterarily meaning "Emperor's mess" (which kind of makes the story less believable, as I don't see the cook telling the emperor that his favourite dish is called Emperor's mess). Anyway… This fluffy and sweet treat is usually served with powdered sugar on top. Traditionally, you'd have it with plum compote or apple sauce, but I'm mixing things up by combining them into a tasty plum and apple compote.

For the jam

  • 5 plums
  • 2 tart apples (e.g. Granny Smith)
  • 1 vanilla pod
  • 1/2 lemon
  • 90 grams of regular sugar (about 1 dl)

This is how you make the jam…

  1. Pit the plums and cut them up skin and all, the skin will give the compote a nice red color
  2. Peel the apples, pit them, and cut them up
  3. Cut up the vanilla pod and scrape out the seeds, then place plums, apples and vanilla pod into a saucepan
  4. Add sugar and the juice from half a lemon
  5. Cover and cook on medium-low heat for 1 hour. The juices will manage themselves.
  6. Now you have a nice compote, not too sweet, not to thick. It's not a jam nor a marmelade, it's… Basically the sauce for your pancakes!

The pancakes

  • 65 grams all-purpose flour (Preferibly 10% protein or less), that's a little more than 1 dl
  • 65 grams (so about 5 tablespoons) of regular white sugar
  • A large pinch of salt (so about half a teaspoon if you don't have fingers)
  • 240 ml milk (that's a little more than a dl, and weighs about 250 grams)
  • 5 eggs
  • 50 grams of butter (2 large tablespoons, whatever a large tablespoon is)
  • confectioner's sugar for dusting
  • Raisins if you like raisings but you can ommit them if they make you angry

And this is how you make the Austrian pancakes…

  1. Unleash your inner wizard and sift together the flour, sugar, and salt in a mixing cauldron. Pretend you're casting a spell!
  2. Separate the egg yolks from the whites. Add the egg yolks, and mix them in.
  3. Pour the milk with the grace of a ballet dancer into your dry mix, stirring as if you're trying to summon a culinary spirit from the depths of the bowl. It should be a nice thick batter without lumps.
  4. Now, in a separate bowl, beat the egg whites until they form stiff peaks, resembling fluffy clouds on a sunny day. Like really really stiff, far more stiff than when you're making meringue.
  5. It's time to stir in the stiff egg whites into the rest of the batter. Don't throw it all in at once, or you'll have troubles combining the two. Stir about one-third of your cloud-like egg whites into the batter first. Fold in the rest with the delicacy of a butterfly landing on a leaf. We're going for light and airy, so don't stir too hard. Fold! You've heard it before in recipe making videos, to "fold in". It simply means to… You know, slowly stir from the bottom to the top like you're folding the batter over itself. Then add another third, fold, and the last third, fold. Now your egg whites are stirred into the batter and it's one uniform fluffy batter.
  6. Now it's time to add the raisins if you're having any
  7. Melt the butter in a pan and lower it to low heat. Trust me, you want low heat for these pancakes or you'll burn the bottom of them before you can fuck them up even more. So you'll fuck up the fucked up pancakes. Anyway, it takes about 4 minutes, or until it's as golden as a treasure chest on the bottom. Then, perform a daring flip over to the other side. If you fail, that's fine, it's all according tot the story behind how these came to be.
  8. Take two forks and rip the pancake into pieces, and let them fry a little more while you shake the pan to make them roll around.
  9. Put the pieces onto a plate. I'm guessing this recipe is enough for 2-3 people but if you're really fat or want to become fat, I guess it's good for one too. Anyway, dust with confectioner's sugar as if it's the first snow of winter, transforming your pancake into a sweet, snowy Austrian paradise.
  10. Serve with your compote and be happy.